The Waiting Room

So, in the past few days my Mother ended up in the hospital and had open heart surgery. She is now resting, as best she can, in her room. My father and I wanted to be at the hospital when she came out of surgery so I met him at their house and we drove one car in.
Upon arriving at the hospital we found the parking garage and sought out a slot for the car. It seemed like there was a convention in town that went horribly wrong. There were very few spots to pick from and the traffic driving around looked like a bunch of people playing musical chairs. Wait for it, there's one grab it.
Once we secured the car we headed into the side entrance, which was about a hundred feet to the left of the main entrance. Inside it looked like a well worn train station. the carpets were dingy and the furniture was aged. My dad found the information desk and asked the gentleman behind the counter where we could find my mother. He told us to go through the doors behind him and just past the inside, on the left, will be some elevators. Take the elevator down to the second floor and when you exit the elevator take a left then another left, walk a long way down the corridor and the PACU will be down there.
Well, we walked through the doors and looked to the left, no elevator. So we walked a little further in and still no sign of a lift. We turned around and walked back through the doors. Maybe he said to walk down the corridor and that's where the lifts are. No luck, but we were now in the main lobby and we found another information desk. My dad asked the same questions. We were told to walk to the cafeteria and take a left just before it, walk down the hall and the elevators would be on the left, the take the elevator up to the sixth floor, exit, turn left then left again down the hallway to the east wing were we then turn right, follow down to the nurses desk take a right and the room is half way down the hall on the right. Yeah, I got it.
We masterfully followed the instructions and arrived at her room, which was empty. We asked a nurse if she could help us find my mother and she obliged. She was down in the PACU on the second floor. Just go to the end of the corridor and take a left at . . .
She must have noticed the tick I was developing on my face so she stopped and said, 'Go to the end of this hall and take the elevator at the end, but don't tell anyone I told you.' We were then instructed to take a left off the elevator and at the end of the hall is were we would find the waiting room.
We found the door to the waiting room and I opened it, there were no lights on, so I shut it. I told my dad that there must be a mistake. I peered into the room again and this time I noticed people sitting in the seats. Must be the right place. I called the nurses station to let them know we were there and then sat down.
The room was almost full of people, nine of them (the room was small). And after a few minutes I figured out that they were all together. And they were from Lowell. The group was mostly young kids with two or three adults. I sat back and listened to the conversation they were having. The kids were murdering the english language and very animated with a lot of expressive body language.
You must use your imagination and picture arms flailing about and bodies contorting around invisible corners all while the expression of complete seriousness is on their faces.
'Yo, I heard Twinkies are com'n back' said one young lad.
'Word, I tink little deb bought the ba'kry." replied the young lad's brother.
'Did'yano, Twinkies don't burn? Imeanya can't catch 'em on fiya, yo." said another sibling.
'Yah, I heard that Twinkies are inflammable, your right" said the mother.
And that, readers, is why we removed the word inflammable from the various explosive containers we see every day.
My mom is doing well.